More Saturday Limericks

The "Friday Poetry" group, of which I am a member, had for two weeks, the  theme as "Limericks", in honour of St Patricks's Day.

As I noted last week, the limerick is a nice form, because you can be silly and surreal, or you can actually be real but succinct, but there is always pretty well always an overtone of fun because of the form. Here are some more of mine for your amusement:

Last weeks can be read at:
http://tonymusings.blogspot.com/2014/03/saturday-limericks.html

I begin with a few Limericks based on real people. The first is somewhat humorous, about Heston Blumenthal, who produces all kinds of strange and exotic recipes - like snail porridge - at his restaurant "The Fat Duck", and people pay quite high prices to eat them!

There was a strange chef called Heston
Whose food confused the intestine
He made snail porridge
Which he kept in the fridge
And found willing diners to test on

In the second case, I look at a topical news story. In that case, the limerick has a touch of irony to its brief comment about the effectiveness of the response to Russia.

There was a Russian called Vladimir
Whose name was a byword for fear
He annexed the Crimea
And wept not a tear
While politicians just said "oh dear!"

The simplest limerick is the silly one, and this is based very loosely on the old saying "patience is a virtue, virtue is a grace, grace was a little girl who didn't wash her face". So here is a tale about that little girl.

There was a young lady called Grace
Who hardly ever washed her face
But her skin was pure
And she looked demure
Especially wearing gowns of lace

And here are a few other light, and rather silly ones. Although I think, many people have met the trendy young Vicar at some time or other in their lives.

There was a trendy young Vicar called Dave
Who embarked on a Mission to Save
Most people did flee
From his third degree
And ran off when he gave them a wave.

A church mouse was quiet as the grave
And used to live over the nave
Until one fine day
He decided to stray
A cat ate him, and he's now in a grave!

And on to fairy tales, and the one about Rip Van Winkle. "Rip Van Winkle" is a short story by American author Washington Irving published in 1819 as well as the name of the story's fictional protagonist. In the story Rip goes into a hollow in a mountainside, drinks moonshine, and awakes 20 years later. It's a myth that has been told of other characters, of course, but this is a distinctly American rendering.

A young man called Rip Van Winkle
Whose eyes had a merry twinkle
Went into caves deep
And fell in deep sleep
And awoke old with skin full of wrinkle

And my final one is from "The Hobbit, or There and Back Again" by Tolkien, the precursor to "Lord of the Rings", and currently being shown in a series of movies at the cinema:

There once was a Hobbit named Bilbo
Who went off to fight many a foe
He faced a dragon
Drank beer from a flagon
And far there and back did he go